FunnyTel introduces unit pricing in new mega-value FAT plans

1180827_double_cheeseburgerComms industry leader FunnyTel today announced its ground-breaking FAT plans. 

No stranger to innovation – FunnyTel was Australia’s first ISP to introduce the random number billing that has since proved so popular with Telstra management – the FAT plans include Australia’s first internet unit pricing scheme.

‘We read about the Government’s idea for unit pricing with groceries,’ says FunnyTel spokesman Chad Blake.  ‘And we thought “This makes sense.”  Why should customers pay for an 80 gigs download allowance and not know exactly how many P2P movies they’ll get for their dough ?’

‘We’re actually thinking of applying to the ACCC for an award for this,’ said Blake.  ‘Our 2 New Hollywood Releases a Night’ plan is a revolution in truth-in-advertising.  ‘And that’s A-FACT !’ says Blake with a cheeky wink.

We asked Chad if he thought that other market leaders like iiNet would adopt the system. 
iiNet to be next ?

‘Not likely,’ he said.  ‘Pretty good operators at iiNet but they’ve been completely unsuccessful in attracting any customers interested in peer-to-peer movie downloads.  Haven’t you been following the court case ?

‘We can’t figure out where they’ve gone wrong, actually.  They seem to be offering all the right plans.  But somehow, they’ve only managed to sign up customers who need fifty gigs to spend between midnight and dawn for sharing home movies with the rellies in England. 

‘Must be very frustrating for them.  All the rest of us have to do is mention a big-gigs off-peak plan and we’re chockers with hungry pirates.  Poor bloody iiNet get stuck with a mob of Methodist parsons peer-to-peering their sermons around the world all night.  There’s no justice.’

FAT plans the NBT

‘Next Big Thing for sure.  Don’t want to give too much away, but you’re gonna love the Harry Potter Lovers’ Special and our new Parrot & Peg Leg package.’

We asked Blake whether marketing thought the ‘FAT’ tag would help customers get the message that the plans were ideal for super-sized downloading.  ‘Hadn’t thought of that,’ he said.  ‘Actually, it stands for Film And Television.’

About Peter Moon

Peter Moon is a commercial lawyer with 20 years experience in the tech and telco industries.
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